Close to 5 years ago, when I felt life was at my worst, I climbed on to my terrace wanting to end my pain and loneliness!! Depression had taken roots and life didn’t seem worth it when I felt like a total loser!! All I knew at that time was everything would be better if only I left!! But luckily for me, the maternal instinct saved me since my urge of protecting and nurturing my child took over and I had the sense to walk down knowing that nobody can and will love my son like I do!!
Today when I finally had the courage to step up there, the place where I last had the thought of killing myself, I realise that not everyone has the kind of after thought when they think about this decision!! Life seems to become peaceful when you end it, but it doesn’t happen so in reality!! You escape your problem but there’s a better way to do it, that is to fight it!!
You think you don’t have the strength, you think you’re at your worst!! You think that people that were to be there for you put you in your worst hole and left you there without any afterthought or guilt and there’s no hope left!! But having been through it, I know for sure, even if the person that mattered the most leaves or hurts you, you still can make it through!! It is painful, takes years and tears and a lot of will power and support to make it out!! But it isn’t impossible!!
Healing is a journey!! It is normal if you’re not ok, nobody always is!! But don’t stay there!! Take your time to get over it!! Because you’re stronger than what you realise and you can make a better tomorrow for yourself!!
Until then, this sunrise here will remind you “it’s always the darkest before dawn!!” Clicking this symbol of hope from the darkest moment of life is my way of telling you that there’s hope no matter what you think!! Don’t lose it!! Rest if you must but don’t quit!!
Takes a hell lot of strength to kill yourself because the natural tendency is to fight for life (as a friend once told, jump into the water and you’ll realise that your body will fight to come up to the surface), it takes a bit more strength to face and fight your fears And pain!!
Reach out to anyone you trust; trustworthy support system is essential to help you come out!! Sending Strength, love and hope your way!! #suicideprevention #mentalhealthawareness
