Random thoughts_47

We are all stuck in our life with the conversation which we should have had, moments we should have lived, apologies we should have deserved!!

Well, it would have escaped your notice, LIFE ISN'T FAIR!!

Easier said than done to move on with these things still unresolved!!

The friend she'd like to loose!

He hugged her close, she felt cold instead of feeling warm.. She found warmth in her jacket, clinging on to it much tightly to provide her warmth!!

He was around her since a long time, slowly and gradually growing into her life, slowly and gradually becoming her friend without her even realising it!!

When she started getting acquainted with him, he seemed to be a solace, she seemed to find peace.. But eventually, his presence started disrupting her sanity..

She wished to go into another person's company, she tried to break his spell and find people like her whom she could connect with but he would always lull her back into the comfort of the known!!

People called her self content, self reliant, self sufficient.. Only if she could show them her friend, "Meet him, he's Loneliness - the only friend I've got"! 

Love

What is the purpose of our life? We have big ambitions, big dreams.. We wish to be successful, we wish a lot of things!! But what's life without someone to share that happiness with, unload your burdens to, be and have as a support??

Love isn't just a fairy tale feeling! Its not only the jitters and butterflies, not just the holding hands and exchanging glances.. Love is a strength: a strength to face any obstacle in life.. Love is an assurance of having someone by your side, someone to hold n cherish, to support and guide, to laugh and cry with!!!

As the most popular verse of the scripture states in 1. Corinthians 13 

⁴Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. ⁸Love never fails. . .

Romans 13:8 reiterates "Owe nothing to no one but love" Further reading states that all other commandments can be summed in "Love one another!"

Here I am wondering out loud, didn't I love enough?? Didn't I genuinely give my all?? Didn't I stay in too long for the miracle of love to manifest?? Did I not do my responsibilities, put in sufficient efforts?? Is there anything more that I should have done?

I always believed that love conquers all.. I believed that love gives the strength.. But love destroyed my life.. It transformed an innocent, naive, trusting person into a very reserved person, a person who is always scared, someone who doubts the intention of every person..

Here I am, battling the thoughts in my head; unable to understand clearly what life ahead holds, clenching my little life's hands, answering his innocent questions without displaying how it kills me inside, feeling helpless about not giving him the sense of security the way he deserves or the kind of life he thinks about out loud, feeling the guilt knowing that I can't fulfill all his needs no matter how hard I try..

Yet, I will love him, as genuinely and truly as I can.. I wanted to give him a life where he is happy and secure, I still can give him that, there's no stopping it.. The little life I'm blessed with, the one that I love still stands as my strength!! Love definitely gives you the strength to face the challenges in life, the reason to fight and a reason to live!!

Love is a Wow or Love is a Woe, it just depends on the WHO!!