But you have to pay a life term price for that strength you develop!!
“Resilience” becomes your personality and you are no longer fazed by any challenge because you learn you can overcome it!!
However, it also brings about a huge set of walls that you end up building around yourself as a defence mechanism..
You no longer need anyone because you’ve learnt to only depend on yourself..
The price you pay for this is not having anyone check in on you because you surely haven’t needed anyone!!
It brings along with it an array of emotional challenges too!! PTSD is your arm candy that doesn’t let you overcome what you’ve been through no matter how “healed” you are!! At the onset of a repeat incident, the body automatically drags itself down to the last time it experienced the same emotions and forgets all the healing journey you’ve been through!!
Along comes anxiety as there’s a constant vigil to protect yourself.. it brings its best friend named “overthinking” and convinces your head to make up all the remote possibilities so that you are prepared for anything that comes your way!!
And with all these things there’s the tinge of depression that is always ready to make its appearance when something seems a bit downhill.. and it has such wonderful capacity to build a mountain of a mole hill and ensure you’re crashed!! And it’s friend, anxiety and insomnia, joins hands in tandem in the mission!!
But the upside of the strength is that Resilience ensures you show up back to accomplish your tasks because you have no other choice and also because you cannot make yourself weak anymore!! This results in the complexities of “high functioning depression and anxiety” that ensures you function in the daily life but the insides of you are slowly eroded!! From feeling a lot to feeling nothing, they ensure you’re hollow from the inside!!
But then some friends genuinely put efforts and show up and they end up filling that void and bringing that happiness!! But the price you pay for being strong is that you do not have many of those friends in your life either!!
Over all, you end up having a strong aura but a plethora of things to fight within yourself to remain strong!!
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